The trailer where Portman & Kutcher
are not attached to each other
Oh my god! Hold on for this one cause you’re about to park on to an epic adventure of romance, humour, embarrasment and - of course - SEX! Just look at the poster! Now who wont want to enjoy their weekend with this one?????
It has maybe the best cast ever: Ashton Kutcher and Natalie Portman! Twihihii, I’m so excited! It’s the oldest story in the book. Two best friends, boy and a girl (anybody knows where this is going?), who are successful beings, financially and sexually (now who wont feel a deep connection to these characters? I know I will!), but for some reason don’t know they are perfect for each other. :( So, when (lovely) Kutcher gets (sexy) Portman into bed they realize that they have to make ground rules for their relationship that they see as a ”sex partnership”, but of course in the end they’ll finally come to their senses and run to each others arms, after a good three quarters into the movie they made some bad decisions and lied to each other or whatever and then they had to make it up to each other. Maybe Portman was leaving the place and Kutcher finally realized that he needed her after all and then he ran after her confessing his feelings to her and then they kiss and bring tears to every individual soul in the theater. (niisk) It makes me cry already.
Where was I? Oh, the best thing is that it’s so modern! The viewer don’t have to magically move their astral bodies into the 1800’s like in that stupid movie There Will Be Blood (more like There Will Be Facepalms Hahahaha!) The viewer can relate to real issues. Issues that belong into his own time. Like hangovers, friendships with the opposite sex, having sex with opposite sex, texting with your cellphone, hanging out with friends. Being American in overall. Don’t have to try and understand that ”me so solly” bullshit like in those Japanese movies. Dumbasses. But anyways, I really enjoyed that trailer. It made me feel good about myself. I’m gonna watch it again.
Oh my god! Watch that part somewhere in the middle where Kutchers roommate shouts at him through the door and the music goes all quiet suddenly and he says: ”I cannot focus on my porn with all this real sex going around me.” And Portman starts to laugh and the music starts up again and we are off. Now that’s some good editing. I seriously laughed and laughed and laughed, when finally I had to stop the player so I wouldn’t miss the rest of it. Oh god (have to clean tears under my eyes). Kutchers roommate is such a douche. If I had one I would treat him just like Kutcher. Lying on my floor with Portman and just laughing at my douchey roommate. Hahaha!
And did you notice that there was also some amount of sad faces in the mix with the funny ones. Now that means there’s gonna be a real serious theme in the story. :/ So maybe I wouldn’t take the little ones to watch this movie. ;) But it’s the perfect movie for your douchy roommate friends, with whom you can relate to the Kutchers character and crack up all the inside boy-jokes that women don’t get, or for your special lady to whom you can after the movie present all the cocky manly material you just learned! Whoah! Hold on to your horns. You have to see the movie first. :D
So I would say it’s perfect for anyone at anytime. It has a very typical white middle class feel to it, so most of the people can relate one-on-one with the plot. It’s the story everybody has experienced at least three times in their lives. It has memorable funny additional characters. First class humour and the best part is that if you ARE still such a loser that you are a nerd and a virgin B), this is the best movie to show you how it’s done! I mean where else you could get a better look at how you are suppose to talk about sex around with people. And where else you will get your ideals of what kind of a man/female role model you should be looking out for. Huh?! I’m telling you, it’s THE movie of your manhood!
And personally for me the final stroke on my hand that drops the money into the cashlady’s hand so that I can go and see this movie with douchey friends and beautiful Portman-like ladyfriend to whom I have been so crushed on since she moved into my neighborhood last summer, and who will fall in love with me after she sees this movie, WAS the ending of the trailer where Portman jumps onto Kutchers back and screams: ”Why can’t we just have sex?!” Hahahaha! Those goofy two! I’m really gonna wait for this movie. Five lying Kutchers!


And the poster sells sex, but doesn’t actually show any. It’s brilliant! Or maybe it sells just a little bit, with Natalie Portman’s fine thighs, which I noticed first, but which didn’t include any unconscious perverted caveman ideas. Absolutely none.
Why are everybody always assuming that!? That if I automatically peek at reviling areas of a woman I’m somehow incorporating sexual agenda behind it. I admit it. I look. But I don’t want to have sex. Well, of course I want to have sex, but I that’s not why I’m looking. If I want to have sex, I wouldn’t look. I would close my eyes, get her gently into the bed, and respect her as a equal member of our society. And then I would marry her. Well, not marry, but date her for a while and then move onto other women. Respectfully. Look, the point is Ashton Kutcher has his pants on, and that’s how it should be.
Notice that they are smiling and looking at each other. I think that is a very good detail. If they wouldn’t laugh, or smile, and look at each other in a flirting way on the covers, how would I know which ones of my blu-rays are comedies?
Like, if they would just think about their plans for the rest of the day, like in reality, it would look like one of those not-another-sad-make-you-feel-bad-drama movies, and I would think: “Why in the world I have this kind of rubbish? How did it even got here? I don’t like these kind of movies. Mush have been a present from some of my lady friends.”